Bad online dating stories reddit lol

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“One girl I met up with was on house arrest and ‘forgot’ to tell me.” via GIPHY 7. That’s cool, I thought, I can be friends with nice people that aren’t witty. A few weeks in, he told me I was almost perfect, except my upper arms were fat. “I had been texting this girl for a good three weeks, and we finally decided to go out on a date.

“I met up with a girl who brought a binder full of laminated copies of her own poems, then asked me to read and critique them at the table.” 8. Then I found out that her nose ring is a weirdly shiny wart that she tries to pass off as a nose ring because she’s embarrassed by it. Without asking, she reached over and started picking toppings of my pizza. “I joined OKC four years ago hoping to hook up with a bunch of girls. I suggest we go to dinner and a movie at an Italian restaurant closer to her place so she can walk/bus, and I can do all the commuting.

Her friend went to her house, where Ashley had apparently left her phone, and her car and the front door was wide open. When she refused I said that I would and lo & behold, Ashley shows up. Didn’t know you cared about me so much lol.’ The next day I go to work. “I’m talking to this beautiful girl, and we eventually make plans to meet at a local pub. He had this weird look in his eyes that screamed ‘awkward 27-year-old that has never seen a boob and is creepily close to his mother.’ I sat down with him, and he put his hand on my leg. He just sort of chuckled and rolled his eyes and put his hand back on my leg.

I usually leave my phone in my truck until lunch, so when I went out for lunch at noon, I had 115 new texts and 48 missed calls. I slapped his hand away, stormed out of the theater, and he followed right after me going ‘What?

I played with the chinchilla a bit, and she kinda got mad at me for playing with it and back in the purse it went.” via GIPHY 2. We got along okay, the conversation went well, and in the course of the date, he asked me about bad dates I’ve been on. She only wanted to communicate through email or the dating site – which I thought was odd but just went with it. She’s married and her husband is a jealous, gun-collecting hunter type who she’s thinking about leaving.” via GIPHY 4. Eventually he asked if I’d like to see his flat, and I said yes.

He had loads of swords and machetes on the wall and decided to hold one to my throat to show me how incredibly strong they were.” 5.

When I got home, she texted me saying that I was just going to use her had we had sex, calling me a pig. Later on in the movie, he put his hand back on my leg but his fingers moved to my inner thigh.

‘High heel shoes…they are impractical and will cripple her making her a liability in the future…’ Sorry, what? ‘I’m surprised nobody has mentioned a high-powered career. Turning down a guy’s advances so as not to seem too easy.’ Ever considered it’s ‘cos we just…didn’t want to? ‘Damn, I cannot stand high waist pants.’ Damn, we love ’em. ‘I find it weird that girls spend most of their time trying to make other girls think they’re attractive, rather than guys.’ Maybe ‘cos we’re not the competitive b*tches you think we are, we care more if a fellow female likes our dress than if a guy on Reddit does, because goddammit, women have better taste. Bright and/or bold lip colours You have no idea how fun it is choosing which colour lip to go with, and you probably never will. ‘Taking nothing but selfies on Instagram, yeah you look good but if you literally show me that you don’t have anything to offer besides good looks I can’t respect you.’ Yeah, fair enough.

I look down and my wrist is extended down and to the left of where it should have been.

My face is a bloody mess, and I still have half a mile to walk.

“I met a girl who described herself as a 24-year old woman who’s blonde.

I arrived on the date, all happy, but realized that the girl who sat was a 40-year old lady with two children and was just finding an excuse to leave her house.” 6. It turns out her roommate had been helping her reply to messages.

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